Monday, December 5, 2011

Extra! Extra!

After my last post which got a little serious, I decided to have a little fun! Below are actual "headlines" from the dating site I belong to along with the first thing(s) that popped into my head when I read them. I left all spelling and puncuation alone...these are exactly what you would see if you were me. For those of you who don't know what a headline is, it is simply a short phrase describing either yourself or what you are looking for in a potential date.....The headline is the first bit of info you learn about the person after seeing a photo. These were just too good not to share....

Looking for a very sexy woman  (Who isn’t?)
Looking for love in all the wrong places!!!  (Get a map!)
Come on!!!! I won't bite!!!  (If you need to point that out, I’m scared)
looking for "one in a million" (Don’t narrow your options so much)
Looking for someone to have fun with  (As opposed to…?)
i live hard,play hard and love hard  (Love hard?? Um, that’s just weird)
looking for a nice friendly and easy goi  (What is a goi? Are they all easy?)
Empty Heart-NEED Refill  (This one had a pic of himself by an 18 wheeler…)
I Plant in the pot...not around it!!!!  (Huh???)
*********************************  (Again, huh???)
I don't have a car...I have a Truck  (A truck, with a capital “T”)
looking for A good woman  (With a capital “A”)
love life good kisser  (I picture a caveman saying this…”me love, me life, me good, me kisser”)
looking for 1 in 7 billion  (Try looking for one in a million….better options)
Like having fun?  (No, I like having misery)
" MUST LOVE.................MONKEY'S? LOL"  (Isn’t that illegal? Not to mention disgusting!)
Looking for a nice girl ... likes animals  (Maybe you should check out the guy who wants you to love monkeys)
cute old guy  (Really? That’s all you can come up with?)
You Never No  (Actually, I do sometimes “No”, at least I do when I’m not “Yes”)
Corduroy Pillows Creating Headlines!!! Film at 11  (10 points for trying to be witty, minus 10 points for failing)
White Chocolate Lover  (You know, white chocolate is not really chocolate…It’s just lots of sugar and milk)
LQQKing to the Starz  (I have no idea what this means…)
Without Sparks, There can Be No Fire!  (Finally, a smart man!)
looking for it all lovefriendshipplaymat  (I think he is a foreigner, I don’t recognize that word)
Lokking for the last one !  (Lokking and popping??)
Quantum weirdness and spiritual energy  (Um…..ookaayy…….)
Looking for a friend to  (To what??? Please tell me! I could be your friend if I only knew what you wanted!)
To be fair, here is my headline:
Testing the waters...  (Oooo, I bet it took her hours to come up with that)

Back to my fishing!

1 comment:

  1. Hilarious! I can't even pick a favorite.